“You’re no sunset, you’re no lair You’re the beauty I admire Burning love, hope, and desire You’re the woods at night on fire Oh I miss you when it’s cold out Church bells ring I hear you sing out You’re no broken record turning You’re a wild melody I know I might not be the one you take Take my love Take my love
When you told me you can’t sleep Count your sins instead of sheep Count the ways that you feel weak but that is not what I see You’re no wreckage, you’re a fighter Scrape the sky by your on power Sound it loud above the water You’re a wild melody
I know I might not be the one you take I’ve got a heart that ain’t afraid to break Take my love”
The simple act of making my 2015 list, a list of things to do and places to see, was all I needed to see the spaces where I’d lost sight of myself over the last year. What became so glaringly obvious was the absence of time spent with some of my dearest friends. The frequent phone calls I’d let slide, the dinner dates I had to cancel, the day trips I didn’t have time to go on. So preoccupied with all of the “busy” I’d signed myself up for, I neglected to realize the cumulative effect it had over the year. I thought pursuing so many of my interests at one time would make me happier; what I didn’t realize was that I was mistaking “busy”-ness for happiness. By no means was I unhappy last year, there was just more time spent alone and less time shared with loved ones. I, for one, am a a big proponent of the idea that happiness is better shared.
So in the spirit of spending more time with friends, I took a drive this weekend to visit a dear friend for her birthday. For a friend who now lives a state away, making the hour drive seem like a breeze if it meant I got to hug her and spend the afternoon in her company. I brought along these treats (despite the sad reality of not knowing whether or not she was still vegan) to share as we’d done many times in college. We caught up, taking turns recounting life as we now know it, took the pups for a long walk and shared laughs with friends over lunch. It’s days like these that I’ll forever remember as happy times; not the certificates hiding in the back of my closet. So 2015 will be a year of capturing moments and relishing in happy times. Of balancing out my desire to always do more with the new found love of doing less.
A huge thank you to Walter Bromwell for creating the above video with me. I cherish every moment we spend together.
I took a step back and let December just be December. I let myself get lost amidst the swirl of chaos and jubilee that lied within those days. It felt the only way to end such a whirlwind of a year. After a year of commitments, homework, and being “busy,” I felt very much unlike myself. Sometimes it takes going to the edge of your limits to understand where they lie.
This year I’ve set my intention to steer myself clear of the edge before it comes in sight. Vowing to give myself more space, more guts to stand on my own two feet, more voice to speak my truth. To spend more days dancing, reading, gardening; doing the things that bring joy to my life. Vowing to cherish my days by filling them with the activities and people that mean so very much to me. Giving up the idea of what I’m supposed to do and replacing it with what I know to be good and true.
I don’t have the words to encapsulate the gratitude I feel for my community. For each and every one of the people who touches my life on a regular basis, for those who have come and gone in my life and those who I only get to interact with from time to time. Lately, my mind has been consumed by the topic of community. The community we surround ourselves with greatly impacts, although often unknowingly, our lives. Not only the life we live out today or lived yesterday, but all of the days leading up to today and for the rest of our lives moving forward. For, our community is filled with endless teachers. Regardless of how we feel about any one of the people in our lives, they come to us for a reason. And for that, I’m eternally grateful. This year I’m giving thanks for all of the people in my life. Thank you for pushing me, supporting me, challenging me, calling me out, laughing with me, questioning me, giving me advice, testing my patience, humbling me, taking the time to get to know me, loving me, spending time with me and most of all being my teacher.
On a whim we journeyed down Highway 1 south to Big Sur. In search of some inspiration and fresh air we made fast plans. We hit the road early and found ourselves at Big Sur Bakery just in time for brunch service to begin. After setting up camp we headed for the mountains. The severe incline matched by the dramatic coastal landscape, each peak revealing itself as merely the base of the next. A persistent reminder that in order to see more clearly, the journey is a continuous arduous upward climb worth every step. After a quiet reflective drive back down the coast, we hit sunset just right overlooking the water. The rowdy group seated next to us filled the place with positivity as they celebrated 60 years of life. A moment I can only hope for and to be surrounded by such adoring loved ones. Huddled around the campfire, we sat in awe, so thankful for the adventure the day had given us.
This recipe is inspired by the mushroom and polenta breakfast at Big Sur Bakery.
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